Poem: Saying Goodbye

About a week ago, Mike and I had to say goodbye to his dog, Marley. He had Lyme disease that went to his kidneys and after a few trips to the vet we were saying goodbye sooner than we ever thought possible.

Although he wasn’t mine, I loved him. He was our family and now he’s gone. We are dealing with it as best we can. But it’s never easy saying goodbye.

Saying Goodbye

I didn’t want to say the words, “put down”
Like he was some shiny toy
We had picked up and lost interest

too cold to think of leaving
Such a treasure behind
to think of all the tail wags, the last sniffs in the snow

the moment before the final moment the worst
a deep sleep that hurts
One final pin-prick, back leg trembles.

I couldn’t find the words to say
I’ll help you
I’m right here
I’m sorry

Then, sobbing in the car like I’d lost something I’ll never find again

Tail wags, brown, liquid eyes full of courage
You’re hurt and you’re dying and all you have to say is: I love you

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Poem: Loser

Because…sometimes. :/

Had bit of a rough week this past week – I know…what else is new, eh? But, sometimes…you just feel it, you know? Everyone is telling you to keep your head up but inside you feel so…unworthy. The facts are there, the encouragement is there, but your mind is telling you: what’s the point? what’s the point? It’s so hard to find the right direction sometimes, when your heart is telling you: “you are lost.”

Loser

five letters

of worthlessness

Lonely

Outcast

Socially Inept

Every misstep

Relapse

not a state of being

it is felt

 

Poem: Heartbreak Feels

heartbreak

time given

love lost

to move on

without you

 

heartbreak

like the color yellow

sometimes ugly

possible bright days a head

 

heartbreak

feet like lead

days stuck in shadow

heart beats a

heavy, tuneless, solo

 

when it hurts to breathe

when the smell of shampoo

has you sobbing in the grocery store

 

we store our memories

with time and love

and heartbreak

Poem: Heartbreak

Author’s Note:

I love finding stuff that I didn’t know I had written. Was in my closet looking for paperwork…I know, who keeps paperwork in their closet, right? But it’s me. I am forever unorganized. And I found this poem in an old backpack. Who knows why it was there…I think I was using it for notes or something. Anywho, thought I’d share. 😛 Hope everyone is having a great night!

Happy Writing!


Heartbreak

I guess I never understood the expression:

loving someone so much that it’s painful

’till now

The way you smile and your eyes light up

your teeth much straighter than mine

makes me think

you don’t realize the power

that a simple touch

and a simple smile has

 

But falling for you

is like getting slapped

a thousand times

 

How do I know you won’t hurt me?

with my brain, my body

the dreams of the future?

It’s all a matter of trust

 

And that’s something I don’t have.