Poem: Find Your Joy

Find your joy
On the darkest days
When the days are short
And the nights are long

When it feels like
All you can do
Is wrong
Find your joy

I look to family
Soft, puppy nose
Colors of winter
I find my joy

In warmth like love
All wrapped up
Happiness is
My babe, the pup

Laughter in the kitchen
Favorite tv shows
Days off of work
When it snows

I find my joy
Shopping online
Sipping tea in the bookstore
On days I feel fine

In walks after work
With the dog and his toys
Long chats on the phone
These littlest of joys

Are bright tokens
of happiness
All stored away
I find my joy

On these darkest of days

Poem: Working Depressed

Drove to work in the rain
Trying to ignore the pain
Of work without sleep
Of sleep without rest
Of not feeling enough
Less than your best

The mood of the day
Is gloomy with rain
Cloudy with thoughts
Temporarily insane
Such is the life
Of the working depressed
Feeling inept
More than the rest

Poem Rerun: “Togetherness” And Writing Updates

So…this past month has been a bit of a rough patch for me, writing-wise. Work has kept me busy and I think that’s part of it.

Anywho, I saw this poem in my Facebook feed from about 3 years ago.  It’s those quiet mornings that mean the most to me sometimes. The togetherness, the comfort of arms holding you close, feeling loved. It keeps me in once piece…

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Togetherness

Each warm smile

was magic

we live wild

with blazing mornings

and times with you

that breathe and steam

an eternity young and never old

Poem: Guilt

enter a book store

isn’t this just a sanctuary

of written thoughts

and quiet nooks

with no judgement

or weird looks

 

fingers trail over paperbacks

science-fiction you’ve never read

till you find a treasure

convince yourself

you need it desperately

it’s all in your head

 

you’re going to read it

as soon as you get home

you’ll cherish it forever

 

but  on the floor

in a plastic bag

it sits alone

 

 

Poem: My Evil Twin, Doubt

Meet my evil twin
I call her, Doubt
she second guesses
Things I’ve figured out

She makes me weak
When I take a stand
Kicks me down
And takes command

Invites her friends:
Anxiety and Depression
Inside I’m roiling:
I’ve made a bad impression

Anxiety whispers to Doubt and
Depression behind my back
They’re making fun of me!
There’s nothing that I lack

I am Beautiful and Strong
Creative and Inspired
My evil twin, Doubt
Is not even desired

She’s shallow and she’s needy
her friends are much worse
Dripping black negativity
Tucking extra in her purse

She’ll swagger up the street
People spring out of the way
Heels clicking, eyes like daggers
With nothing great to say

All The Happy Little Trees

I am appreciating the outdoors today and the sunshine, even though it’s pretty cold outside! It’s as if Bob Ross were here painting all his happy little trees…

Mike took this picture on our walk today. This up and down weather is taking its toll on the small streams and canals in the area. There’s been some flooding from blockages from ice floes.

I somehow caught pink-eye over the weekend; and the handle to my driver’s side door snapped off when I tried to open my frozen car door last night, but I am choosing to remain positive. Was actually a great triumph for me to laugh about it, instead of let my anxiety take over.

Plus, I’m inside and warm, and that always helps, too. Hope everyone has a great Sunday and keep safe out there!

Happy Writing all!

Poem: Isn’t Enough

Feeling the super feels tonight, guys.

 

When something feels like nothing

doubts, hopeless feelings

that maybe you aren’t good enough

exhaustion, like maybe

you’re just not right for this

 

It’s hard to tell anyone, though

they only see what’s on the outside

it’s hard to believe a friendly face

could be suffering

 

She wears a brown, fuzzy sweater

her eyes are blue and full of life

but maybe underneath

you see her fingernails are really paint-chipped

the lips wobble

smudge on her dark pants

eyeliner is beginning to run

 

her mind runs a marathon everyday

her heart is squeezed in two

maybe breathing isn’t as second nature

as it should be

 

you might feel like you know her

you might feel like

nothing can be as complicated

as what you see on the outside

but you don’t hear

what her whole self is saying

behind the smile

Poem: Loser

Because…sometimes. :/

Had bit of a rough week this past week – I know…what else is new, eh? But, sometimes…you just feel it, you know? Everyone is telling you to keep your head up but inside you feel so…unworthy. The facts are there, the encouragement is there, but your mind is telling you: what’s the point? what’s the point? It’s so hard to find the right direction sometimes, when your heart is telling you: “you are lost.”

Loser

five letters

of worthlessness

Lonely

Outcast

Socially Inept

Every misstep

Relapse

not a state of being

it is felt

 

Poem: Underneath

Underneath the job title

a bunch of broken people

he’s socially awkward

her husband died

she lost a baby that no one knows about

her marriage is in shambles

he’s got a story to tell

anger and heartbreak, a tiny jail cell

pasts that stay hidden

desires, and oily thoughts

we hide our devastation

a work-place facade

to avoid humiliation

as we trudge a long

head bowed, shattered and bought